Sexy Lines From Sexy Movies

(source: chicogarcia.wordpress.com)

1.“There are 70 ways to make a man happy: Number 1 is to LOVE him…and the rest is 69.”
2.A girl to her boyfriend who’s always getting himself into trouble: “Para kang bird mo! Kung saan masikip, doon sumusuksok!”
3.“Ang gusto ng misis ko, cat style. Parang doggie style…pero sa bubong.”
4.MISTER: “Alam mo hon, yung titok ni Pare, parang champoy.” MISIS: “Kasing kulubot ng champoy?” MISTER: “Hindi…kasing alat…”
5.“Yang birdie mo parang tsismis…it passes from one mouth to another!”
6.“Para kang cellphone, pag pasok sa tunnel, nawawalan ng network!”
7.“Laro tayong baril-barilan…patira naman, kahit isang putok lang!”
8.Couple making love. Woman: “ANSELMOOO!” Man: “Hayop! Sinasabi ko na nga ba! Sino si Anselmo?” Woman: “Tanga! Ang cellphone mo, nagva-vibrate!”
9.Dad talking to son about the birds and the bees: “Anak, alam mo ba ang ibig sabihin ng bl*wj*b?” Son: “Nagawa ko na po yan…masakit sa panga…”
10.Woman: “Binabalaan kita, pauwi na asawa ko!” Man: “Bakit, wala naman akong ginagawa sa yo, ha!” Woman: “Kaya nga, gawin mo na bago siya dumating!”
11.Old maid to young stud: “Mas maasim pa ko sa sinigang ng nanay mo!”
12.Girl: “Huhuhu, hindi na ko virgin! Walanghiya ka, dalawang beses pa!” Guy: “Ha, minsan lang natin ginawa ah!” Girl: “Ay bakit, hindi na ba tayo uulit?”
13.Teacher to student who kept on sneaking in and out of the classroom: “Para kang rapist! Labas-masok ka ng walang paalam!”
14.Guy: “Eto na ang tren, papasok na sa tunnel!” Girl: “Hoy, hindi ka sa tunnel pumasok! Nasa imburnal ang tren mo!”
15.Girl to guy as she put her hand on his crotch: “Akala ko…life lang ang hard…”
16.Scene: Two girl friends talking. Girl1: “Girl, ano pagkakaiba ng ari ng lalaki at kamote?” Girl2: “Yuck, I don’t eat kamote!”
17.Scene: Juan goes to a clinic for a bloodtest. Nurse: “Sir, naubusan po kami ng bulak, kaya sisipsipin ko nalang.” Juan: “Sige, kung ganun…papa-urinalysis na rin ako!”